NEW 1991 POLITICALLY CORRECT LABELS OLD LABEL: NEW LABEL -------------------- conservative: reactionary the Establishment: White Power Elite hearing person: temporarily aurally abled sighted person: temporarily visually abled blind: visually challenged mute: vocally challenged dead: metabolically different alive: temporarily metabolically abled ugly: aesthetically challenged fat: alternative body image rude: politically correct psychopath: socially misaligned bald: follicularly challenged non-white, non-male: oppressed white: melanin-impoverished, genetically oppressive white male: oppressor black: african-american asian: asian-american afro-american: african-american pregnancy: parasitic oppression janitor: sanitation engineer dishwasher: utensil sanitizer dairy: where cows are raped ranch: where cattle are murdered egg ranch: where hens are raped biology department: where animals are tortured and then murdered to fulfill the sadistic fantasies of white male scientist lackeys of the imperialistic drug companies fishing: raping the oceans farming: exploiting mother earth paper bag: processed tree carcass
To: Royce From: The Woodmeister Subject: Banner Just saw your banner when I sent the last message. Love it! It made me laugh. You make me laugh. You make me cry. You make me hiccup. You make me flatulate uncontrollably around good-looking schnauzers. Good-looking schnauzers make me hiccup while crying because I've been laughing too hard and am now in pain. Pain makes me find schnauzers attractive. A good-looking hiccuping schnauzer with red eyes from crying at how piteous my laughter sounds just reminded me that I've got a class to sleep through. Later! The Schnauzmeister
Subj: RE: sheesh (46/50) From: Robert A. Iris #87 Last on: 3/23/92 To : Woodstock #120 Date: Mon, Mar 23, 1992 7:58:03 I attended drama school there for a year and we would go downto the science center on group trips. (HAH!) The room goes dark. Speakers come on around and above and below you. A deep voice says welcome. A tiny dot of green light appears high above you, about where venus would be in the sky. And then the scream And the sky errupts into red and yellow. People and objects fly throught the air. Butterflys and cash registers. Strange patters of visual rythym. Your mouth keeps falling open and you try to keep it closed but things, beautiful things keep falling out of the sky. It should never end. Then it does. And the lights come on and the deep voice says thank you and the speakers go quite as the lights turn night into day as you applaud.