Some nights you just find the most bizarre stuff floating around on the ‘net.

Neil Gaiman had a song bouncing through his head the other day, and mentioned it on his weblog. Several people then wrote in to let him know of the location of an .mp3 of the song. After getting permission from the author, Mr. Alan Moore, Neil has quite kindly made the .mp3 officially available: The Sinister Ducks’ “March of the Sinister Ducks”.

Everyone thinks they’re such sweet little things.
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.
Soft downy feathers and nice little wings.
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.
But there’s a poison I’d like to administer;
You think they’re cuddly, but I think they’re sinister!
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.

I’d never heard of the Sinister Ducks before, so after grabbing the song for myself (and being quite amused by it, I did a little Googling to see what I could find.

What are they doing at night in the park?
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.
Think of them waddling about in the dark!
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.
Sneering and whispering and stealing your cars,
Reading pornography, smoking cigars!
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.

According to this English/Portuguese interview with Alan Moore, it turns out that this was a small side project of Alan, Alex Green, and David J. (of both Bauhaus and Love and Rockets) in the early 1980s, roundabout 1983.

Nasty and small: undeserving of life.
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.
They’ll sneer at your hairstyle and sleep with your wife.
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.
Dressed in plaid jackets and horrible shoes,
Getting divorces and turning to booze!
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.

I’m now going to have this song bouncing around in my head for the indeterminate future. I urge you to download it and listen to it yourself — both for the amusement factor in the song itself, and so I’ll be happy in the knowledge that I’ve inflicted this upon other poor souls. ;)

Forcing old ladies to throw them some bread.
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.
Who could deny, they’d be better off dead?
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.
Look closely and you will recoil in surprise
At web-footed fascists with mad little eyes!
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.
Ducks. Ducks. Quack-quack. Quack-quack.

iTunes: “March of the Sinister Ducks” by Sinister Ducks from the album Old Gangsters Never Die (1983, 2:34).

[See also: What the heck is this from? | Girl talk, MT32b3, and Alan Moore | Need some free shoes? | Wall St. Journal mocks Rachel Corrie’s death | More protest music links ]

« Jason gets his heart back | A look at the Iowa caucus experience »