Sex columnist Dan Savage recently asked his readers to submit letters detailing their childhood misconceptions about sex. The resulting two columns are hilarious…

Part one — the boys:

I was about 10 or 11 when we visited my Aunt Edie. I’d already had “the talk,” and I had a fairly good idea of what “adult” meant. Adult movies. Adult videos. Adult magazines. I was told that my Aunt Edie now lived in an “adult community.” Now, my aunt was a good 80 years old by this point, and I’d met her wrinkly ass at a few family gatherings, so when we got to the (clearly labeled) adult community, I got really creeped out. I asked my parents if they were really supposed to bring a kid in here, and upon more questioning explained my reasoning. After laughing so hard my dad had to stop the car, they cleared everything up.

Part two — the girls:

I went with my dad to visit his best friend, who bred Saint Bernards. While there, I saw this large wooden contraption and asked Dad what it was for. Turns out it was a breeding support, so the dog (who is usually well over 150 pounds) doesn’t hurt the bitch. My dad explained what a mommy dog and a daddy dog do to make puppies. He explained as accurately as a 4-year-old could understand, and I seemed to get what he was talking about. Later that day, we came home and I ran up to my mother. “Mom! Guess what I learned today!” I then proceeded to give a fairly detailed description of what a mommy dog and a daddy dog do to make puppies, followed by the exclamation, “You and Dad should do that!” You see, I wanted a puppy.

(via MeFi)

iTunes: “Dreams” by Cranberries, The from the album Alterno-Daze: 90’s Natural Selection (1995, 4:33).

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