Monty Python and Enjoying Problematic Media

There are the Monty Python skits everyone knows and remembers fondly. Then…there are the others.

One of the interesting things about going through all four seasons of Monty Python (not watching, but stepping and skimming through as I add chapter markers for the skits to my rips of the just-released restored box set) is realizing just how frequently blackface (and full-body makeup) appears. It’s not every skit or even every episode, but it’s not just a one-off occurrence, either.

I’m sure this isn’t exactly breaking news, nor particularly surprising to those who have a more in-depth familiarity with Monty Python over the years than I have. I watched it in my youth, I know the most popular sketches, have watched and own many of the movies, and so on, but haven’t just sat and watched the shows themselves in ages (and I have to wonder how much the shows I saw were edited for US/PBS broadcast when I was first seeing them). And while the full rewatch will happen a bit later, after I’m done getting the rips chapterized, converted to .mp4, and added to my Plex server, even this quick skim through has been a somewhat eye-opening experience.

This doesn’t mean I’m no longer a fan of Monty Python. But it’s another reminder that it’s okay to be a fan of problematic media, but you should be able and willing to recognize and think critically about those parts that are problematic, rather than just glossing over them or shrugging them off.

Dik Od Triaanenen Fol (Finns Ain’t What They Used to Be)

A bit of silliness here. A few months back, Prairie and I went to see Monty Python’s Spamalot when it was here in Seattle. In the programs, where you’d expect to find the show information and cast/creator bios, there was instead very Pythonesque information about ‘Bin Faaarkrekkion’s New Moosical, Dik Od Triaanenen Fol (Finns Ain’t What They Used to Be)‘. The actual Spamalot information was a few pages back in the program, of course. Here, though, for those who may not get to see Spamalot onstage, is the skinny on ol’ Bin Faaarkrekkion.

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Spamalot (And Some Etiquette Grumbling)

Sunday night, Prairie and I headed downtown to the Paramount to see Spamalot. We’d been hoping to get a chance to see it ever since it opened on Broadway, had happily memorized the soundtrack after it was released, and snapped up tickets as soon as we heard that the touring company was coming through Seattle. We even sprung for expensive seats, on the main floor of the theater, rather than our usual far more affordable seating (somewhere in the vicinity of the Scottish highlands).

First things first: overall, it was a good evening. We enjoyed the show, and it was a lot of fun to get to see the sets, staging, and choreography — all the bits that just can’t be conveyed through a soundtrack album. The jokes were fun (even though, as long time Monty Python fans, there weren’t really any major surprises in store), and seeing how they translated some of the film’s sight gags to live theater was a real treat (specifically, the Black Night’s dismemberment and the attack of the Killer Rabbit). The performances on the whole were quite acceptable, with the standout performers being Patsy and Sir Robin, with the Lady of the Lake and Lancelot not terribly far behind them.

However, the night was not without a few disappointments. Firstly, a few that are pretty much connected directly to the show itself:

  • Arthur forgot his lines! Well, okay, line (singular), but still. Goofing up the lyrics to “Always Look on the Bright Side of Life,” the opening number of the second act, to the point where not only does the line not rhyme, but it doesn’t even quite make sense anymore, isn’t exactly impressive. Overall, both Prairie and I got the feeling that Arthur was well and truly ready for this run to be over — his entire performance came across like he was bored, tired of the part, and just sleepwalking his way through it. We were quite unimpressed.

  • Also at the beginning of the second act during “ALotBSoL,” and possibly triggered by Arthur’s flub, one of the nights (the tallest of the troupe) stumbled and fell, landing on the umbrella that was being used as a prop, breaking it so that it didn’t open and close properly for the rest of the number.

  • The sound in the theater (or at least in our seats) was horrendous! It was balanced so horridly that rather than sounding like the actor’s voices, only louder, everyone sounded like they were being piped through the old PA system used for assemblies at your elementary school. On top of that, it was mixed so poorly that during the company numbers, the principal voices (Arthur, the Lady of the Lake, etc.) got completely buried in the ensemble, and you couldn’t hear them at all.

Overall, as much as we like Spamalot — and we do — this was far from our favorite show at the Paramount. In hindsight, if we could go back and re-do things, we’d have been quite happy with using the cheap seat tickets for Spamalot, and splurging for floor seats for Young Frankenstein.

Then, of course, there’s the frustrations you find when you have to deal with the general public.

  • It’s truly distressing how few people think of theater as Theater (with a capital ‘t’). Both Prairie and I were brought up to see a night out at a show as something special. It’s not something that happens every day (or even every week or month), and so it’s not something to be taken completely casually. It is something that should be dressed for: I’d argue for good business work clothes at the minimum, if you’re not actually going to take the time to dress up. Above all, jeans and t-shirts? Not acceptable!

  • While we’re eternally grateful that most people have finally figured out that cell phones should be turned off (or at least silenced), if you have to hold your iPhone at arms length to snap a shot of you and your (jeans-clad) buds before the show, and end up waving the phone in front of the face of the person sitting beside you, coming perilously close to knocking them in the head…maybe, just maybe, you shouldn’t be fiddling with the damn phone.

  • While she probably isn’t, if your girlfriend is so stupid that she just won’t understand any of the humor without your explaining it to her…then she’s just going to have to suffer and cope with a little confusion. Keeping up a running commentary for the entire show consisting of saying the jokes along with the performers on stage and then explaining each joke, why it was funny, and which Monty Python episode or movie it originally came from, making sure to point out any notable differences between its original incarnation and its current stage version…is NOT acceptable. Honestly, I’m surprised Prairie just didn’t smack the guy midway through Act I (except for the fact that she knows how to comport herself in public).

  • One last thing: a standing ovation should be given for extraordinarily good performances. Not for every performance you happen to be at. Not for slightly above average performances. And certainly not for performances with flubbed lines, broken props, and bad sound. I’ve noticed this trend a lot lately, where it’s more rare to be at a performance that doesn’t get a standing ovation than to be at a performance that does. That’s really not how this is supposed to work, folks. A standing ovation is something special, to be reserved for those truly stand-out performances, not used for every performance you bother to attend.

People really amaze me. And not in good ways.

So, wrapping things up: people suck, can’t (or won’t) behave properly in public, and most of them really shouldn’t be let out of the house. The show, while suffering from some very notable rough spots, was generally very enjoyable, though in the end, not quite the experience we were hoping for. For another view, here’s Prairie’s look at the evening.

Monty Python’s Lord of the Rings

One of my favorite old pre-web ‘net institutions was the Internet Oracle. You’d send a message off to the Oracle, and the Oracle would answer your question. In return, you’d have to answer a later question someone else had sent to the Oracle, thus becoming the Oracle yourself. Not very surprisingly, in-jokes, puns, and general absurdity are highly prized when crafting Oracle answers.

I’d more or less forgotten about the Oracle until Phil dropped a link to the Internet Oracle website into my del.icio.us inbox today.

Immediately, I went to the most recent “best of the Oracle” digest (I used to have a whole collection of their “best of” digests), and found this gem:

The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

Oh Oracle most amazing wonderful, I grovel before your sheer brilliance
and wit, whose puns not even Noel Coward on his best day could have
matched,

What is a good question to ask you?

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

You know, last time someone asked me this, I suggested asking about
Monty Python’s Lord of the Rings. And I fobbed them off because they
hadn’t asked that. So to make up for it, and because you groveled so
nicely, here it is.


Aragorn: I am the rightful King of Gondor!
Woman: Well, I didn’t vote for you.
A: You don’t vote for kings.
W: How’d you get to be king then?
A: I am the descendant through sixty generations, father to son, of
Elendil of Numenor. Here is Anduril, the Sword that was Broken, and
is now reforged!
Dennis: Inheriting a three-thousand-year-old bit of tin from your
great-grandad is no basis for a system of government.
A: Be quiet!
D: I mean, if I went round saying I was Lord of Moria because I owned a
rusty hatchet, they’d lock me up!
A: Shut up!
D: Ah! See the violence inherent in the system! Help! I’m being
repressed!
A: Bloody peasant!

How to Recognize Different Ents From Quite A Long Way Away

Number One: The Larch.

Gimli: Is Ori here?
Orc: No.
G: Is Fror?
O: No.
G: Nali?
O: Dead.
G: Loni?
O: Gone.
G: Floi?
O: No.
G: Are there in fact any dwarves left in Moria at all?
O: No. I was deliberately wasting your time.
G: I see. In that case I’m afraid I’m going to have to cut your head
off.
O: Fair enough.

Number One: The Larch.

Aragorn: Now stand aside!
Lurtz: That’s just a scratch.
A: I cut your arm off!
L: No you didn’t!
A: What’s that, then?
L: Just a flesh wound.
A: Fine. [chops Lurtz’s other arm off] Victory is mine!
L: Come on! Have at you!
A: You’ve got no arms, you stupid orc!
L: Yes, I have!
A: Look!
L: I’ve had worse.
A: I don’t have time for this. [cuts Lurtz’s head off]
L: Oh? Call it a draw.

Number One: The Larch.

Gandalf: How long is it since Saruman bought you?
Wormtongue: Gee, I didn’t expect a kind of Orcish Inquisition.
[The doors of the hall burst open, and three Uruk-Hai enter.]
Ugluk: NOBODY expects the Orcish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is
surprise. Surprise and fear, our two main weapons. Our two main
weapons, surprise, fear, and an almost fanatical devotion to Saruman.
THREE main weapons, surprise, fear, nice black uniforms… I’ll come
in again.

Number Four: The Bristlecone Pine.

Bridge keeper: Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me
these questions three, ere the other side he see.
Frodo: Ask me the questions. I am not afraid.
BK: What… is your name?
FB: Frodo Baggins.
BK: What… is your quest?
FB: To destroy the One Ring!
BK: What… is your favourite colour?
FB: Blue!
BK: Right. Off you go.
Sam: That’s easy!
BK: What… is your name?
SG: Samwise Gamgee.
BK: What… is your quest?
SG: To destroy the One Ring.
BK: What… is the capital of Assyria?
SG: [pause] A!
BK: Smart-arse. Go along, then.
Gollum: Ask us!
BK: What… is your name?
G: We’s Smeagol!
BK: What… is your quest?
G: To get the Precious!
BK: What… have I got in my pocket?
G: [pause] We don’t know that! Aiieeee!

You owe the Oracle a picture of Rohan’s army banging coconut halves
together.


Dear Sir,
I wish to complain in the strongest terms about the preceding answer.
It was nothing but a series of rehashed sketches with a few choice
words added. Yours, Arthur Philip Dent (Mrs), deep fine leg, Norfolk.

Dear Sir,
I never wanted to write this oracularity anyway. I wanted to be a
LUMBERJACK!

Colonel: Stop that! It’s silly!

iTunesDream Baby (Nocturnal)” by My Life With the Thrill Kill Kult from the album Sexplosion! (1992, 7:05).

You won’t succeed on Broadway if you don’t have any Jews!

SpamalotI spent most of the first part of my morning in tears today — because I couldn’t stop laughing. Last night I noticed that the iTunes Music Store had the Broadway cast soundtrack to Spamalot. Of course, that was a no-brainer impulse buy.

So far I’ve only listened to it once straight through, and that was while working, so I didn’t catch quite everything, but it’s hilarious.

The show, of course, is “(lovingly) ripped off from the motion picture Monty Python and the Holy Grail,” and much of the best-loved elements from the movie are in the show, along with a few other bits and pieces from the Python canon (including ‘Always Look on the Bright Side of Life‘, and even the fish slapping dance).

Some of the best parts that I’ve found so far, though, are lampooning Broadway itself, with two obvious standout tracks.

The first is ‘You Won’t Succeed on Broadway‘, which points out that there’s no way for any show to be a hit unless there’s a Jew in the story. It all starts (as I’ve found thanks to a few reviews) after Arthur and his knights are given a task by the mighty Knights of Ni: they must open a hit Broadway show.

Arthur: Have you heard of this…’Broadway?’

Robin: Yes sir, but we don’t stand a chance there.

Arthur: Why not?

Robin: Because! Broadway is a very special place, filled with very special people. People who can sing, and dance — often at the same time! They are a different people, a multitalented people, a people who need people, and who are in many ways the luckiest people in the world. I’m sorry sire. We don’t have a chance.

Arthur: But why?

Robin: Well…let me put it like this…

In any great adventure
if you don’t want to lose,
Victory depends upon
the people that you choose.
So listen Arthur, darling,
closely to this news —
We won’t succeed on Broadway
if we don’t have any Jews!

The second, and so far my favorite piece from the soundtrack, is ‘The Song that Goes Like This,’ a deliciously perfect sendup of the über-schmaltzy headlining track in far too many modern Broadway shows, most notoriously those of Andrew Lloyd Webber (apparently, this song is sung in a boat surrounded by candles as a chandelier descends from the ceiling…sound familiar to anyone?).

Lancelot: Once in every show,
there comes a song like this,
it starts off nice and slow,
and ends up with a kiss.
Oh, well. Here’s the song
that goes like this.
Where is it? Where? Where?

Lady of the Lake: A sentimental song,
it casts a magic spell,
They only hum along,
we’ll overact like hell.
Oh this! Is the song
that goes like this.

Both: Yes it is. / Yes it is! / Yes it is! / Oh yes it is!

Lancelot: Now we can go straight
into the middle eight,
a bridge
that is too far for me.

Lady of the Lake: I’ll sing it in your face,
while we both embrace.

Both: And then!
We change the key!

And it just goes on…it’s wonderful.

Pick it up from the iTMS, or if you’re partial to physical media, from Amazon. It’s well worth adding to your collection.

iTunesDiva’s Lament (What Ever Happened to My Part?)” by Ramirez, Sara from the album Spamalot (Original Broadway Cast) (2005, 2:32).

Requested: The Meaning of Life

Requested by Tim Who?:

What is the meaning of life?

It’s a movie by the British comedy group Monty Python.

Why are we here? What’s life all about?
Is God really real, or is there some doubt?
Well, tonight, we’re going to sort it all out,
For, tonight, it’s ‘The Meaning of Life’.

What’s the point of all this hoax?
Is it the chicken and the egg time? Are we just yolks?
Or, perhaps, we’re just one of God’s little jokes.
Well, ça c’est le ‘Meaning of Life’.

Is life just a game where we make up the rules
While we’re searching for something to say,
Or are we just simply spiralling coils
Of self-replicating DNA. Nay, nay, nay, nay, nay, nay.

In this ‘life’, what is our fate?
Is there Heaven and Hell? Do we reincarnate?
Is mankind evolving, or is it too late?
Well, tonight, here’s ‘The Meaning of Life’.

For millions, this ‘life’ is a sad vale of tears,
Sitting ’round with rien nothing to say
While the scientists say we’re just simply spiralling coils
Of self-replicating DNA. Nay, nay, nay, nay, nay, nay.

So, just why– why are we here,
And just what– what– what– what do we fear?
Well, ce soir, for a change, it will all be made clear,
For this is ‘The Meaning of Life’. C’est le sens de la vie.
This is ‘The Meaning of Life’.

Either that, or simply ‘42‘. Your choice.

iTunesAnimal…Come Back Animal” by Williams, Paul from the album Muppet Movie, The (1979, 1:30).

Always look on the bright side of life…

Have I ever mentioned how much I love Monty Python?

Spurred by the recent success of Mel Gibson’s “The Passion of the Christ”, the Python boys have decided to celebrate the 25th anniversary of one of their films by re-releasing it to the theaters.

Which film?

“The Life of Brian”, of course!

The Biblical satire will be re-released in Los Angeles, New York and other US cities to mark its 25th anniversary.

Adverts will challenge Mel Gibson’s blockbuster with the lines “Mel or Monty?”, “The Passion or the Python?”

Distributor Rainbow said it hoped the film would “serve as an antidote to all the hysteria about Mel’s movie”.

If it hits Seattle, I’m so there.

(via Kirsten)

iTunes: “Ich Bin von Kopf bis Fuss auf Liebe Eingestellt (“Falling in Love Again”)” by Burroughs, William S. from the album Dead City Radio (1990, 2:28).